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April 23, 2004

Taken from actual newspaper ads:

Illiterate? Write today for free help.

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Auto Repair Service.

Free pick-up and delivery.

Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.

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Our experienced Mom will care for your child.

Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.

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Dog for sale:

eats anything and is fond of children.

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Man wanted to work in dynamite factory.

Must be willing to travel.

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Stock up and save. Limit: one.

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Semi-Annual after Christmas Sale

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3 year old teacher needed for pre-school.

Experience preferred.

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Mixing bowl set

designed to please a cook with round

bottom for efficient beating.

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Girl wanted to assist magician in

cutting off head illusion.

Blue Cross and salary.

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Dinner Special:

Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00

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For sale:

antique desk suitable for lady

with thick legs and large drawers.

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Now is your chance to have your ears pierced

and get an extra pair to take home, too.

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We do not tear your clothing with machinery.

We do it carefully by hand.

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For sale. Three canaries of undermined sex.

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Great Dames for sale.

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Have several very old dresses from

grandmother in beautiful condition.

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